is my blinker on?

At the most recent werewolf meeting, we concluded that only when a guy is already interested in a girl or when a girl is already  dating somebody (whatever that term means these days), do girls get unprecedented attention from men. Girls often go through several bouts of nothing that sometimes last months or even years. However, the second somebody shows vague interest, all of a sudden girls become man magnets. 

With the advent of laptops, the internet, faster planes, railroads, cars, and smaller phones, as well as our enforcement of gender and racial equality and democratic values, we are left under the impression that we are better than animals because we make complex things and think in more complex ways. However, I am convinced that we are just as animalistic as before. However we deny this animalism, and this fucks us up. Why is it that the second one guy decides to text a girl continuously, does another guy who showed vague interest months before, all of a sudden just appear in the girl’s life, demanding attention? 

I would like to call this the “guy must pee on girl” problem. Despite the fact that previously, guy 2 did not take any sort of action regarding his desire for the girl, only when proper ownership or "dibs" of the girl in question was threatened did he make a move and figuratively decide to try peeing on the girl. I wonder what it is that girls project or where the blinking light is located that goes off when they are already receiving male attention, and why it is that that attracts more male attention. Or, alternatively, I wonder if single girls emit desperation vibes somehow and that in itself is a turn off? All of this makes ZERO sense in the grand scheme of things. Logically speaking, if someone is already involved with somebody, men should not be more attracted to that person, but instead go for somebody who is single and available? If the western world is to sustain itself and not replicate children of men, guys need to stop only going for girls who aren’t available, and pursue girls who are down. Seriously, the world’s population is at risk. Ignore the blinkers. Just go for it. 

420

Today, I realize, is 4/20! What this actually is meant to celebrate, I am not quite sure (check Wikipedia if you are curious for the history). What I do know is that it results in many people smoking joints in public at 4: 20 pm on April 20^th, as a giant “fuck you” to society at large that regularly prohibits such behavior.  Everyone thinks that they are being extremely rebellious and badass by doing this in public, in the day time, where everyone can see. This made me wonder about the number of things that are considered pretty peculiar or even reprehensible in the daytime, like drinking, smoking pot, and having sex, but are considered fully acceptable at night. I believe that these acts fall within the heading of what historian Anna Clark calls twilight moments,  “those sexual activities or desires which people are not supposed to engage in, but they do.” She suggests that because these activities transpire under a shroud of darkness, they are merely perceived as temporary and that as a result, when it becomes day again, people “return to their everyday lives, and evade a stigmatized identity as deviant.”  Anyway, I am of the school of thought that says that if you are comfortable doing so, if you have no responsibilities for that day, if you use birth control, and if you aren't hurting anyone, go ahead and screw societal norms! Also, happy 4/20! Here are some songs that make things great. 

 fly girl get em- BJ the chicago kid

the recipe - Kendrick Lamar ft. Dr Dre 

Runaway - Kanye West ft. Pusha T

The beautiful ones / Sex is on Fire - Beyonce

Another You - Tony Williams ft. Kanye West

19 Tips for Males in 2012

Yesterday on Thought Catalog, Christopher Hudspeth wrote an article entitled 19 Tips for Females in 2012 which paints women (once again, sigh) as materialistic, silly, appearance-obsessed cliches. The article was tagged with a disclaimer that reads "I know these tips don't apply to the majority of females and I'm kidding (for the most part)," and I sense this was done to stop women from finding where he lives and egging his overly expensive apartment in Williamsburg. As a reaction to this list, I now present 19 Tips for Males in 2012. 


Disclaimer: I know these tips apply to the majority of males between twenty and twenty-six and I am not kidding (for the most part)


1. If her greatest attribute is a nice body, run in the opposite direction (Smart girls are better because (shock!) you can actually talk to them
2. Start approaching girls and stop being afraid of them, because we still want to be pursued though we are "modern" and self-professed feminists. Really, it doesn't take much. 
3. Don't believe that girls do not want sex as much as guys because that really is not true at all. 
4. Just because a girl has an edgy hair cut does not make her an interesting individual.
5. Always. ALWAYS take the advice and listen to Beyonce about how to treat women. 
6. It is alright to watch sports and talk about sports but don't get mad if I get bored sometimes. 
7. Do not wear tattered, dirty clothing. This causes instant loss of hard on for women. 
8. Do wear t shirts that expose nice arms. Nice arms are nice. 
9. We get it, you like dubstep. Just don't shit on other people's music. There are other genres out there! 
10. Personal hygiene is as significant as you think. I have heard of plenty of girls rejecting decent guys because they didn't shower enough, or because they shaved improperly.
11. Don't "Act like a Lady, Think like a Man." Start acting like a gentleman and approach a lady like a man. Bring chivalry back. We like this.  
12. It is probably best to respond to texts immediately instead of waiting to appear aloof. Express interest or disinterest in a time effective manner. Games are not appreciated. 
13. If you base your expectations of women on porn, or on Charlize Theron films, please stop. 
14. Rule of Thumb: If she cancels plans on her girlfriends for you, she really cares for you. A girl's best friends are the most important thing to her. 
15. Never say or think "She is not very pretty, but I think regardless, I kind of love her." No. If you did love her, you would and should think she is the most beautiful, amazing person.
16. Stop thinking we don't like to eat. We love to eat. Food is great. Bring on the cheese. All the cheese. Cheese is the way to our heart. Screw flowers.  
17. Don't neglect us for Call of Duty, World of Warcraft or any number of video games. Play it when you don't have plans with us, sure, but don't neglect us to play a video game because that is pretty immature. Plus, it won't have sex with you. 
18. STOP thinking we hate on other women so much. It seems that you are the ones being overly critical, using a woman's "moustache hair" or Adele hips as a reason to not date her. Don't put that shit on us. 
19. Stop making things so complicated. Boys like girls. Girls like boys. Boys like Boys. Girls like Girls. Just get on it. Just do it and don't even think about it.